Another IWW exclusive ECW report with your man of the hour.... RAY RHODES!
Money in the Bank qualifiers and we have Kennedy against Sabu. Kennedy, the WWE's new golden boy comes in and knocks off Sabu. I'm so glad we have Kennedy and Booker T in this match and not Shelton Benjamin and Sabu. Ray Rhodes sarcasm alert! Not a terrible match but with Sabu getting the majority of the offense it was only a matter of time before he does the JOB. Again here, Kennedy shows that going to Wrestlemania is a big deal but I can't help but wonder if maybe, just maybe, Sabu has paid enough penance to get out of the perennial dog house. I guess not.
Balls Mahoney takes on Striker but only for a few moments before SNITSKY comes in and lays out Balls, giving him a DQ win. One only knows why they bothered to give him a win since SNITSKY boots Striker as well. SNITSKY is perhaps the most vile man ever created by the hand of God. If you connect the dots of his body acne, you would surely draw the face of the Devil himself. On the bright side, Test and his Big Boot are now gone from the WWE so SNITSKY's boot reigns supreme.
Kevin Thorne and Marcus Cor Von takes on RVD and Tommy Dreamer with a bunch of people at ringside. If you've been paying attention, you've already guessed the outcome. The "New Breed" pick up the win. Originally, I was a fan of this angle since I thought it would be an opportunity for the New Breed guys to get some much needed experience and a good way to keep the Originals on TV. But typically, it's just another way to bury the originals even more. If you bury a bunch of guys and then have some other guys beat them, you aren't doing anyone a service. Ho-Hum. Still and all, RVD and Dreamer still show up to work, it's a paycheck, and they're toughing it out. I give them credit.
Now, I don't know this for a fact and it's something Zip would have to check on but I would imagine ratings for ECW starting going down around the same time RVD and Sabu both were de-pushed, Extreme Rules matches became all but extinct and then again when the Big Show left. This is when ECW became truly a dumping ground for green and uninspiring wrestlers. Don't get me wrong, I'm not the biggest fan of the old ECW and I wouldn't want it back. But I liked this new ECW, when it combined some of the old, some of the new, and a 4-4 and half star main event each week. Now it's become ham n' egger city and that's no one's fault but McMahons. We've been getting a more clear view on what his vision for ECW is, and it doesn't look good for anyone, fan of the old ECW or not.
Steven Richards makes his yearly match proving he still has a job. CM Punk defeats him using Knee-Based Offense which is sweeping the indy scene. We're back to Punk squash matches on his road to Wrestlemania. My guess for next week? Little Guido.
Extreme Expose leads me to turn the channel to Law and Order. Olivia looks like she had her nose smashed with a frying pan. Back to ECW just in time for the CAGE MATCH.
I like how they make it seem like 5 minutes is such a short time but the majority of RAW and ECW matches are 5 minutes and under. However, I think they've found a way to make Lashley watchable–5 minute time limits. Run with it. Seriously though, Holly gets his ass handed to him again and if the rumors of elbow surgery are legit, this would be the excuse. In case Lashley forgot which elbow, he made sure to hit both of them a bunch with the chair. As ECW went off the air we get a outstanding WWE classic moment with Lashley throwing himself at a section of the cage and having it break and fall on Umaga sending both men sprawling to death. What I don't understand is why Lashley is so angry at Umaga. I realize they're both representing important people and Wrestlemania is a big deal. But really, what is in it for Lashley? They should have had a promo with Trump promising Lashley a comical sack full of golden doubloons or something. While I like the intensity, I'm just don't buy their hatred for each other rests solely on a haircut that neither man is involved in.
Final Thoughts: 5 matches in an hour, none of them had any time to get anything going. Best match would be the opener just because watching Sabu jump around entertains me. And he successfully used the leg takedown on Kennedy as the opening move. Main event was effective with a lasting memory. The rest of the show was trying to build up talent: SNITSKY as a monster, the New Breed as legitimate, and CM Punk back on a push. I know I've been complaining a lot lately but I just don't agree with Wrestlemania booking and some of these angles. I'll give this show 3 and half Chuck Palumbo heads, which in my book is a solid C Plus. Wait, SNITSKY BOOTS bump this up to 4 Palumbo heads...which squeaks out a very low B.